I know the answer to this question can look different for everyone. When we say someone is strong we could get the picture in our heads of a bodybuilder lifting 300 pounds easily. Or maybe it’s doing a100 one handed push ups. In this case i”m not talking about physical strength although that is important too.
I used to think being resilient is true strength and I believe it still is but I think there’s more to it than that. Bouncing back everytime does take a strong person. One who won’t give up and doesn’t quit. But to me true strength is being resilient and authentic and vulnerable and bottom line real.
Sometimes the people that shout from the mountaintops say they are being real but something about their energy gives off something different. They might feel the need to say they’re real but do the actions match up? Actions speak louder than words is a phrase I’ve said often throughout the years. Sometimes people aren’t ready to get vocal about deep issues that can be triggering for others. Fear tries to creep in when right before big shifts.
Maybe you’re not ready to do a Facebook live or share part of your mess with the public. I get it. I’m still working on it myself and I choose to get better at it. The main thing that keeps me going is thinking about all the people that need my help to walk through their fire. They won’t know I can help if I don’t open up. I also choose to tell my story and what worked for me and what I needed. I don’t really appreciate when people tell me I should do something or change this and do it this way. And I do my best to not be bossy and judgmental anymore. It doesn't feel good but in the past when I thought I was helping I was actually hurting more. It’s important to remember that each of us have our own way of doing things. We must be kind even if and especially if someone’s way of doing things or processing is different than ours. It doesn't make it right or wrong, just different. Bottom line to me true strength is being kind and loving even when there’s a disagreement and being vulnerable and open to have difficult conversations that are deep and can be life changing.
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