Our family stuffy Squidward

Our family stuffy Squidward
In a world where emotions can sometimes be challenging to express, a new companion has emerged to lend a helping hand. Meet our adorable stuffed animal, whom I've named Squidward. He has a happy face side and a sad/mad face side. This cute and cuddly toy not only brings joy to children and adults alike but also serves as a valuable tool for understanding and describing emotions when identifying and articulating words may be difficult.  

This stuffy is a friend to everyone, regardless of age. Whether your child is navigating the complexities of emotions or a stressed out overwhelmed mama that might not know what assortment of feelings are coming up, this toy lends a listening ear and a comforting hug. Its soft and huggable exterior makes it the perfect companion for moments of joy, sadness, or frustration.

Understanding and expressing emotions is an important aspect of emotional intelligence and I'll be honest up until a few years ago there were many times when asked how I was feeling my answer was everything. It was burdensome to name it before processing and working through it.  This stuffy has served our family as an excellent tool for my son and I with the wide range of emotions we experience. By simply flipping the toy's face, we can portray the energy we are feeling visually and thus starts a conversation.  

I even saw a Squidward on a car's dashboard and giggled to myself. I can picture the happy side out for when the driver and car ride is going smoothly and then flipping it inside out to the mad side if someone cuts them off or traffic gets crazy.  It's a much better option than flipping other drivers off in my opinion. 

Our family loves and appreciates our Squidward. To us, this cute stuffy is more than just a toy; it's a companion that helps bridge the gap between emotions and words. Whether you or your child is learning to navigate feelings, this cute and cuddly friend is a very useful tool  I'm grateful for our Squidward. It's a great conversation starter for us and will also get us laughing to shift our shiitake. 

Oh by the way, if you'd like to grab one for your ohana, here's the link:https://bit.ly/ahmsquidward and if not no worries.

Shame and Forgiveness

Last night I watched a movie called Eat, Pray, Love. It’s based on a book by Elizabeth Gilbert. I’ve had this book on my bookshelf for years and started it a few times now. When I was aimlessly scrolling through Netflix I noticed Julia Roberts played the main character so I thought why not. 

In the movie, Julia Roberts realizes she’s unhappy in her marriage and gets a divorce. She decides she’s going to travel the world to gain some insight and to heal and find herself. She travels to Italy, India and Bali and learns something from each place. After watching it, I definitely wanted to book a flight across the world ASAP. 

One thing that I noticed was that in every place she went, people asked if she was married and she’d say no, I’m divorced and in each and every different country it was frowned upon big time. Every time someone would ask her this question I’d cringe inside for her. Shame is so ugly yet people do it and it hurt others.

Since I’ve been noticing what I’m noticing, I looked deeper into my feelings of shame and why a divorced woman in a movie was triggering me. What was the lesson for me? I went back in my mind and memories and remembered when I felt shame as a little girl. My parents were young teenagers in love and oops here I was. Again the issue came up when my 8 month son at the time was not allowed to have a baby dedication service because I wasn’t married.

I always felt out of place and I had to try to fit in with everyone to be liked because of the shame thing. I thought maybe it was like a big tattoo on my face saying she’s damaged, stay away.  I’m almost 40 years old and these thoughts and feelings still come up. It’s a work in progress.  I have to remind myself that I was chosen to be on this planet during this time- not a mistake. I came here with a purpose and a voice with my unique perspective.. Many times when I felt alone I still felt protected from Above. 

I did an AFT (aroma freedom technique) today which uses memories and oils to work through feelings and emotions that come up. Shame and unworthiness came up a couple of times (rounds) in this past I’m not an AFT practitioner, but I know that when I’m fully present in AFT sessions I get so much out of it.  This last time I felt a big shift within me after forgiving people and even myself a couple times. I forgave them for not knowing any better and myself for not speaking up.  I’m so grateful for the tools and community that I have now.  

Forgiveness is not about the other person but more about freeing up the space and energy by releasing that person or situation. I used to think that I had to tell someone when I forgave them meant I had to point out what they did wrong and magically I was the angel. Now I see that I had my part to play as well and I can forgive from afar and send love and light and go on my way and make sure to do better next time. Make sure I’m not shaming myself or people around me that I love. I choose to be more kind and more loving and see more opportunities and possibilities.